Mornings can be bad for me. Especially if I didn’t get a good night’s sleep due to a restless child, or just my own inability to get comfortable enough. My hubby knows that mornings are generally best if you just give me some space and let me do my thing in silence. But this morning was a different story. He comes in the bedroom at 6am and asks me if I can get up and make him a sandwich for lunch. This immediatly sends stress waves throughout my body, not because I have a problem getting up and making something for him, but because we have NOTHING in the house to make for him right now. See, this is an ongoing issue that we have. I feel like all we do is spend money on groceries, and they dissapear so quickly. Like we just went to the grocery store as a family last Sat night, and stocked up for the week, spent $80 something dollars, thinking that it might last us for the week…but no, we are bone dry.

I give my hubby a hard time alot because I say it is mainly his fault that we go through food so fast, and that I end up spending so much money at the grocery store in the first place. Yea, he doesn’t like these talks. I know it is not his fault that he has SUCH a high metabolism and therefore his breakfasts consist of 3 courses each morning, the fact that a “lunch” for him needs to consist of not just a sandwich, but a sandwich plus chips and salsa, an energy bar and other misc snacks. And when I say that it is because of him that I spend so much at the store in the first place I mean this…he is the kind of guy that will not eat just any ol brand of whatever. He has specific brands for specific items that I MUST get, otherwise if I try to save some $$ and buy whats on sale or something else that I feel is equal, it just sits there and he will not eat it. Honestly, I have never met such a picky eater. Just picky in the sense of brands, if something is “day old” vs fresh off the truck he won’t touch it either. The thing is, we are not rich. Far from it actually, and I guess I was raised in a family were we didn’t spend $4+ per loaf of bread(only to have it disappear in 3 days) or that we had to spend the extra money on “name brand items”. He says that I am a chef, and I should know that these “name brand items” exceed in quality. Yea, maybe my taste buds are fried, but I guess I don’t always agree with that.

He is a BIG snacker. I can’t keep enough in the house. And I really am not complaining because I think it is great that he is such a healthy eater, and wants things like dried fruit, raw nuts, $2+ energy bars, flax chips, etc…but let’s face it, these items can break the bank!!! I just went to the health food store the other day and spent the $100 dollars that he gave me on nuts, chips, fruit, etc…and now he asks me “what did you do with all the money I gave you…what did you even buy if we are out of bread, oj etc??” Yea, well that $100 filled a medium sized bag and he has probably already eaten half of everything..

Sorry, this is a major need to vent morning, as you can see this is an ongoing issue that I face. I like to feel like I take care of my family by feeding them good, healthy food….keeping the laundry clean, having the dishes done, etc..but so often I feel like the water rises over my head and I am sinking and can’t keep up with it all!! And then to be critcized by my hubby for spending so much of his hard earned money, and where does it all go, etc…I want to SCREAM!!!!! I swear to god all I do is buy groceries, and pay the bills…and the minimum amts at that. Are we ever going to get ahead?? I mean what do we have to do?? I use cloth diapers, cook all our food at home, rarely eat out, maybe him and I go out to a movie once every couple of months…I just get so frustrated when I feel like we are not moving forward, when it seems like all hubby does is work, work, work…..and he works hard. He thinks I don’t appreciate all he does for the family, but I do. I know he is out there working 10+ hr days for all of us, so you are appreciated honey, very much so…

Sometimes you just need to get something out in order to move forward with a fresh outlook. This is what this is, sorry you had to be a part of it..(for anyone who actually reads my blog). But I do feel better now. I just hate the fact that my day started out with a fight and feelings of anger on both our parts, I just want to call him and apologize for being so grumpy, but it is probably best to just leave him alone..(men don’t care as much as we do about the emotional part of things).

Ok, it’s Friday, and I have made my list of things I want to accomplish today around here. It is sopost to be really hot and muggy here, and we have not broken down and turned our air on yet..(another way we try to be thrifty..) so it will be a challenge, especially with me getting huge and hot….

Time to move forward, thanks for listening:)